I ran into a sweet friend at church over the summer and as we were chatting and catching up she made a comment that has stuck with me that I've not been able to shake. She commented about how my life looks so great and that I do so many fun things with my son and that she wished she could have a life like mine. She sees my life via Facebook. You know the glorious life we all live via FB. Don't most people just post the positives in their lives on FB? My life isn't all cupcakes and rainbows and truth be told, I'm a liar on FB.
I don't share much of my personal life with people. Not the real deep and dirty stuff that I've gone through over the last few years. Those really close to me know of course but that's just a handful of people. FB isn't a place for me, or anyone for that matter, to air their dirty laundry but most importantly, I don't air my dirty laundry because my dirty laundry is intertwined with someone else's dirty laundry and while I have a story to be told, I have to be careful that I don't tell the other person's story as it's not mine to tell.
Here's my truth: my life is hard. Cupcakes and rainbows it is not. I've been raising a child by myself for 6 years and there's been a lot of very difficult times during those 6 years, even with God walking along side of me. I've been in a courtroom fighting for my child who was/is unable to fight for himself. I've stressed out at the thought of the potential danger Ramsay could be in if the courts made a decision without really knowing all the information. Child support isn't a regular thing so financially I can't count on that money to help with bills. I was in a year and a half long court battle with my son's grandparents whom instead of helping and supporting me when their son couldn't, decided to take me to court costing me thousands of dollars which should have been used on providing for their grandson. I'm still working on trying to pay off that debt which seems like it's never going to go away.....well the case went away, just not the debt.
Here's another truth. It's lonely. Sure, FB makes it look like I'm happy and I've got it all together. I don't. My weekends are usually spent at home with my kiddo because #1-it's expensive to go out AND pay a babysitter, and #2-there's really no one to do anything with. No one asks me to go out to dinner or for coffee. Sure, people mention it in passing or even mention helping out with Ramsay but never follow through. Holidays are the hardest. We spend holidays at home with my mom. It's just the three of us.
But in all of this, I do know one truth for sure. God gave me this life for a reason. While I never thought I would be a single mom, it's given me a purpose and drive to do good for other single moms. No one knows better what struggles a single mom goes through then a fellow single mom. We are stubborn and often won't ask for help. So, if you know a single mom, reach out to her. Ask her what you can do for her. Take her for coffee. Invite her and her family for dinner. Spend time with them. Get to know them. Get to know her. While you think you would be blessing her and her kids, I can just about guarantee that you'll be blessed as well in ways you never thought you would be.
